BLOG Readers:
I have exciting news! We are just about 6 weeks away from a great couples event at First Baptist Church in Florence. September 11th and 12th I will be speaking at their annual couples conference. I will teaching on relationships and personality. The conference is called "Understanding the Love of Your Life and it is an excellent conference that will give you and your mate lots of tools to help with your own marriage or serious dating relationship. Contact me to sign-up (or the church directly) and also check out the promo video for the conference. It is really cool!!!!!!! Click here for the video.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Thursday, July 02, 2009
Still Feel Like Giving Up on Marriage?
By Gary Chapman.
Adapted from Desperate Marriages by Dr. Gary Chapman. To find out more about Dr. Chapman's resources, visit www.fivelovelanguages.com.
Whatever you do, don't give up on your marriage.
I know that if you are in a deeply troubled marriage, you may feel that you only have two options: stay in the marriage and be miserable, or divorce and hope for something better. There is a third alternative. Try the power of unconditional love. Few people can resist love when it is expressed in the right language.
Should you stay in a marriage for the sake of the children?
When parents divorce, typically children feel intensely rejected. Children get angry at their parents for violating the basic rule of parenthood. Parents are supposed to make sacrifices for children, not the other way around. Because we are creatures of memory and relationships, we carry the pain of broken relationships for a lifetime.
After the divorce, most parents plan to continue good relationships with their children, but parent-child relationships are forever altered by divorce. As adults they often fear that their own marriage will not survive. And in fact, the divorce rate for "children of divorce" is higher than for those whose parents stay together. So, do your children a favor and continue to work on your marriage.
Does divorce seem like the best alternative to you? If so, I hope you'll think again. Divorce, unlike death, does not end the partners' contact with each other. Most end up living in the same city, especially if children are involved. And your disagreements about how to raise children will continue.
Nor is divorce a pretty picture financially. Research indicates that 73 percent of divorced women experience a decline in standard of living. One wife said, "Our marriage was bad, but our divorce is even worse. I still have all the responsibilities I had when we were married, but now I have less time and less money." The effects of divorce linger for a lifetime. So do yourself a favor call a counselor, read a book, or reach out to a pastor. Your marriage is worth it.
Adapted from Desperate Marriages by Dr. Gary Chapman. To find out more about Dr. Chapman's resources, visit www.fivelovelanguages.com.
Whatever you do, don't give up on your marriage.
I know that if you are in a deeply troubled marriage, you may feel that you only have two options: stay in the marriage and be miserable, or divorce and hope for something better. There is a third alternative. Try the power of unconditional love. Few people can resist love when it is expressed in the right language.
Should you stay in a marriage for the sake of the children?
When parents divorce, typically children feel intensely rejected. Children get angry at their parents for violating the basic rule of parenthood. Parents are supposed to make sacrifices for children, not the other way around. Because we are creatures of memory and relationships, we carry the pain of broken relationships for a lifetime.
After the divorce, most parents plan to continue good relationships with their children, but parent-child relationships are forever altered by divorce. As adults they often fear that their own marriage will not survive. And in fact, the divorce rate for "children of divorce" is higher than for those whose parents stay together. So, do your children a favor and continue to work on your marriage.
Does divorce seem like the best alternative to you? If so, I hope you'll think again. Divorce, unlike death, does not end the partners' contact with each other. Most end up living in the same city, especially if children are involved. And your disagreements about how to raise children will continue.
Nor is divorce a pretty picture financially. Research indicates that 73 percent of divorced women experience a decline in standard of living. One wife said, "Our marriage was bad, but our divorce is even worse. I still have all the responsibilities I had when we were married, but now I have less time and less money." The effects of divorce linger for a lifetime. So do yourself a favor call a counselor, read a book, or reach out to a pastor. Your marriage is worth it.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
